The Misfortune Teller
You Can't Do A Wrong Thing The Right Way


"Just One More Last Blank Rubber Check"

The American Government wants "just one more last blank rubber check" from the American people. What does that mean?

Well, that depends on what "just," "one," "more," "last," "blank," "rubber," and "check" mean, both as individual words and collectively as a bloated Orwellian euphemism designed specifically to confuse and demoralize the American people.

After four straight "war" years of bald-faced, unfunded raids on the American blood bank and treasury, we can only marvel at the chutzpah -- i.e., "unmitigated gall" -- of a government completely unembarrassed by a record of reckless, bloody blundering unprecedented in the nation's history. Even worse, though, must come the judgment of future historians wondering how on earth any nation so willingly plundered by its own rapacious "leadership" could dare to consider itself "modern," let alone "civilized" or even "educated"?

Reportedly a "democracy," the American voters in the last election soundly repudiated Sheriff Dick Cheney, Deputy Dubya Bush (the Mayberry Machiavellis) along with the Republican Party (the Mayberry town council) for insisting that both America and Iraq allow George W. Bush to continue his little ego trip playing commander-in-briefs for at least two more fruitless, inconclusive years (that would make six in total) at a cost that no one can even begin to calculate for benefits that no one has ever stipulated. So where could words like "just" (meaning "merely"), "one" (meaning "less than two"), "more" (meaning "additional"), and "last" (meaning "latest in a long sequence") fit into any sentence that a human brain could process without self-destructing from the internal inconsistencies? (Think here of the old Star Trek movie where Spock cleverly disables a diabolical computer by asking it to compute "to the last decimal point" the value of Pi.)

Given the unmistakeable electoral repudiation, Sheriff Dick, Deputy Dubya, the Republican Party, and now the Democratic Party as well, apparently wish to tell the voters -- in effect -- to go screw themselves and their "democracy." The governing group, as Sheriff Dick said even before the electoral spanking, plans to "stay the course" and contiue steaming "full speed ahead" right into the giant iceberg clearly floating ominously in the direct path of the Titanic. To hell with the expressed survival instincts of the ticket-paying passengers!

With the newly installed Madam Speaker of the House wielding the purse strings to the nation's empty purse, we then have to ask who wears the pants in the new "family valued" Congess? But then, how could we possibly tell, what with everybody in Congress running around in their soiled Iraqi diapers?

I just heard Speaker Nancy Pelosi promise "no blank check" for Deputy Dubya's long-lost war on the now-hung Saddam Hussein and his long-defunct government of Iraq that never had any WMD, ties to Al Qaida, or involvemtent in 9/11/2001. Then, I immediately heard from her "number two," Steny Hoyer, that he thought differently. Now, don't these people ever talk to each other before they talk to everyone else out of both side of their mouths at the same time? And that just goes for starters in the House.

Over in the Senate, we have the Democratic Party's "leader," Hary Reid, joining Nancy Pelosi in "opposing" any more troops for Iraq. Then, we immediately hear from Democratic Senator "Bloviatin' Joe" Biden that the President can have whatever war he wants and no Congress can tell him anything about how, where, when, or why to wage it.

These people just don't get it. They simply can't cut the crap. The people want them to do three things: (1) cut the funding, (2) revoke the authorization, and (3) punish the perps. That will end the present Amrerican War on Iraq and teach the governing group not to even think about any more such disasters for at least another twenty years. Despite what Bloviatin' Joe says, previous Congresses have done all three of these things and this Congress had better get started on all three of them simultaneously now. We demand that they cut out the crappy mixed metaphors and flawed figures of speech. We've heard them all for four years running and don't want to hear them anymore.

The issue for deadbeat, free-lunch America doesn't involve "blank checks" but "rubber," "bouncing" ones. It doesn't matter if the rubber check has only the busted gambler Deputy Dubya's worthless signature on it or comes with the worthless counter-signature of a spineless Democratic Congress, too. The rubber check bounces no matter how many crooks countersign for each other. The looted American treasury has no money in it and no new stream of tax revenues to replenish the account. So Dubya and the Democrats think they can just go on tapping the kids' trust fund "just one more last time" for absolutely nothing? They need to cut the crap and stop the thieving. They need to quit robbing the future to pay for more needless warfare welfare and makework militarism. Our kids and grandkids who haven't even gotten jobs and started paying payroll taxes yet need us to stand up for them and tell our lying, incompetent, dingbat governing group: "Stop, thieves!"

Now, Congressmen, Senators, and corrupt co-Presidents: clean your dirty diapers and put either your dresses or pants on over them. And then cut the crap. Start putting money back into the accounts. Start replenishing the nation's blood bank. No more rubber checks -- blank or otherwise -- that you sign yourselves when you all ought to serve time in jail for conspiracy to defraud the American people.


Michael Murry, "The Misfortune Teller," Copyright © 2005-2022